– give my muse food. feed me.
Although a little cautious by nature, Saima was never one to turn down some good food when offered. Even if they did have to ask about the sudden generosity. “Did you just want to share some of this with someone or ..what?” Curiosity poked at them even while they were enjoying the benefits of a free snack. Nothing tasted as good as not having to pay for it. Although the fact that this was actually really tasty seemed to be an incredible bonus.
“That’s definitely a relatable desire. To seek simplicity where it can not be found, to find some kind of stillness in the midst of activity. I can certainly see the appeal in such a desire.” They idly drum their fingers on the table as they think. “Although I might not be the best person to take you anywhere close to the basics.” As calming a presence they might be, Saima’s own existence had hardly ever been remotely simple.
“I do wonder- is this a consistent thing with you? Or has something recent exacerbated that thought?”
🌹… a confession.
“I’ve been feeling better since I’ve made some significant changes to the way I’m going to be living my life. I-I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s not super healthy for me to just take on responsibilities for the sake of doing so. Even if it doesn’t quite make sense for me to do so.
I appreciate that I’m in a position where I can change things rather easily that many might not have. But, honestly, I think things have gotten to a point where a change is necessary for me, at least personally.
I guess this has been the year of bringing everything to the light for me. Which…isn’t necessarily a bad thing.”
a story about the past.
“What kind of story do you want? It’s hard to describe the past when it’s often so mixed in. Mixed in terms of whether I was actually around, in the way I had been involved. It’s..an interesting situation to be in. However, I guess I can tell you about some of the ways I lived among people. I did a lot of music-related work. I helped teach kids folksongs that remain to this day, along with some that have unfortunately been lost. Sometimes people would let me tell stories about way, way back – about the stars, about stories of creation, about the gods that they worshiped. I’ve gotten to see them in person. I knew that they had existed in a way.
I’ve done work as a scholar, a farmer, a musician. I don’t really know.. I’ve just been shifting roles along with the times. And sometimes my sense of the past is off-kilter because I’ve had to flit out of this present space to avoid being caught up in some of the circumstances people have faced.
I guess the consistent thing is being something of an observer, a volunteer, and trying to bring a sense that there was so much more than what one could see.
But it’s hard to articulate the ways that I’ve crossed between worlds – bringing a sense of truth to the more unusual aspects of belief that people have.
“Well, the fact of the matter is that the reason is that people might not see me at official things is that I’m more or less stepping back from being a representation. It’s not what I have been made to do, it’s not my ultimate purpose – there’s a whole story there that might stretch the limits of belief.” Saima gives a little bit of a self-conscious laugh.
“Nonetheless I’ll be around to help in case of emergency. ” Their whole energy starts to change a little bit, their eyes alter in a way that gives away that something else has been lurking in them for quite some time.
“I’ve been doing this. But..it’s not the best for me to keep doing so consistently. As much as I can adapt to the times, I have to keep a solid sense of my original self – that’s been neglected for way too long. So I might as well make this common knowledge and go from there if anyone has questions.”
Saima has been re-evaluating how everyone appears to them lately. It’s the side effect of reverting back to their totally nonhuman self. It definitely leaves nations in a more distant position than ever before – but hey, it’s not like Saima ever felt like they really belonged among them anyway. But they can’t say that these faces won’t be familiar. It’s not easy to forget someone like Eliza – someone whose language still reminds them of a home in a distant way. Whose spirit had been indomitable and among whom they’ve managed to find some kind of familiarity among these representation sorts. As always Eliza is a striking presence, totally likely to draw the attention of anyone in the room – her beauty and personality being quite attractive in their own right. They definitely plan on continuing to visit her every so often. Although explaining the change in circumstances might be a little bit… interesting, to say the least.
Since encountering Stella, Saima has definitely found themselves improving in their mood just because they don’t feel so completely disconnected from the world around them. It seemed like only the simple matter of finding other beings similar to them could bring a lot of peace.
“Tell me, what you have been up to all this time. I’m sure you have some stories under your belt.“ Over some coffee, it only seemed appropriate to spend some quality time with someone they could come to hold so dear.
“friends come in and out of your life like busboys in a restaurant, did you ever notice that?”
[just throws a pillow at Lilli. Well, not even throws – because they didn’t really use their hands to do it. But there is a pillow flying at Lilli’s face.]
Think fast!
“I can agree that history has been unkind. It’s why there are other stories, other connecting threads that keep the lives of those whose experience history going in alternative ways. In a way, it makes the memories seem not so short. Albeit that has been my experiences in that way.”
Seekesotsibteadmist 